This week’s question comes from Dawn A:
“Can a Twin Flame truly stop Running,
and if so what is the best way to do this?”
A: Thank you so much for this question, Dawn! I’m glad you ask this, because the Runner phenomenon is something that comes up again and again on the Twin Flame journey for many – and there are so many articles out there on this with contradictory messages and perceptions…
The answer is: Yes, someone can permanently stop Running! Because Running is caused by a triggering of subconscious fear, which we can clear out painlessly and quite quickly.
Let me explain:
The Underlying Cause of Running
Some sites and Twin Flame experts will tell you that Running is caused by an energetic repulsion because the Chaser Twin is being too forceful – and that the lesson is for the Chaser to let go and surrender.
There may be some truth in this and a valuable lesson to learn, but please remember that overwhelmingly Running is not something that the other Twin is at fault for or can permanently change by altering their behavior.
Even if a “Chaser” can stop Chasing and the issue is resolved for a period, the Runner will inevitably still “Run” again at some point, when the subconscious fear is triggered yet again. Here is why:
Running is what I’d psychologically term as a defense reaction – from hundreds of intuitive sessions with Twin Flames I’ve been given the opportunity to attune to the inner feelings and energies of so-called Runners as well as their Twins.
Here is what I have observed: Overwhelmingly, the Runner is not withdrawing because he or she has fallen out of love with or has lost interest in his or her Twin. On the contrary, the emotional and energetic cause of Running is fear. Subconscious fear, at that.
The Most Common Runner Fears
Now, there are many different kinds of fear involved but the most common root fears the Runner experiences are fear of rejection (so they reject first), fear of not being good enough (so they expect ultimate rejection and reject first), fear of abandonment (so they leave you before you can leave them), fear of unworthiness (feeling that nothing this good could ever be meant for them), fear of hurt (a general fear of where there’s something good, something painful must inevitably follow).
In most cases these fears are incredibly strong but unconscious, and the actual running is something that happens as an outer, automatic reaction to protect the person against hurt. And unwittingly, when the two Twin Flames interact in a way that triggers fear in the Runner – they Run. Without truly knowing why.
This is where energy comes into play. All fear is energy: you’ve probably felt this energy yourself, and I’m sure you’d recognize the energy of fear if you were presented with it. Fear feels contractive and tight and low and nauseating – as opposed to love, which feels expansive and big and high and exhilarating.
Fear is one of the lowest energetic frequencies on the spectrum we operate on – and it can become lodged in us on such a deep level that it lays dormant until a situation or a person triggers it.
This is something psychology has worked on for decades – buried trauma and fear patterns are the single biggest causes of neuroses and dysfunction in our modern society.
Scars From Childhood
When we experience something painful in life, the trauma becomes embedded in us on an emotional and energetic level, the energy and emotion we felt at that point gets trapped inside us like a pocket of negativity.
Physiotherapy also works from this perspective: that physical pain can be a psychosomatic expression of a traumatic event lodged in the body and psyche, and once you find and release it, the “outer symptom” (in this case Twin Flame Running) will fade away.
Most of us inevitably have “scars” and patterns resulting from painful experiences, often from childhood (and if you believe in reincarnation, trauma from past lives). So if you for example have experienced being abandoned by a previous lover or a parent in childhood, this intense pain will have caused an energetic “scar” in your being.
(I’ve created a Inner Child Healing For Twin Flames, which you can have a look at here).
Triggers and Lifelong Cycles of Avoidance
What happens next is that whenever a situation or energies resemble that situation and energetically trigger that latent trauma, the person will feel those negative energies and emotions being stirred up again. Even years later.
This can be very painful but often the person is unaware of where the pain or negativity comes from.
In this way a person can develop a lifelong fear of commitment in romantic relationships based on being abandoned by their parent in childhood, for example, because they experienced such deep pain when opening up to love and it was taken away from them that time.
For the Runner, something makes them fear getting closer to their Twin. Getting close with their Twin is associated subconsciously with pain, in some way.
Most of us have some kind of trauma lodged in our beings in this way, but we all react differently to them.
The Runner uses escape as their means of defense and a way to regain control over the circumstances, whereas a Chaser type will use pursuit as a means of trying to salvage the situation.
How to Resolve Running for Good
The bottom line is that energy is malleable, and once we go into a person’s energy field and find the root cause of a particular person’s Running (i.e. the place in their energy field where the fear is lodged) we can clear it.
Consider it almost like a surgical procedure – we go in and with minute precision clear out that particular thing (completely painlessly) without damaging anything surrounding it. With energy tools we can clear things effectively in a very short time!
And once that fear is gone, the automatic reaction of Running won’t be triggered anymore. The person will relax and open up in a completely different way because the trigger will be gone. Once we’ve cleared the cause of Running, there will be no cycles of Running anymore.
I’ve experienced this time and time again myself and with clients – where something that had always been intensely disturbing to the person became completely different once we used energy tools to clear it. It feels lighter and like there’s no scar there anymore.
You can try the Free Help Kit for Twin Flames to get started on this right away – when you work on your energy your Twin will be positively impacted too, it begins to shift the whole dynamic between you because Twin Flames share an energy field.
Clearing Trauma For Good
When we have trauma around a certain issue or person, the very thought of it triggers a host of uncomfortable feelings and it often feels like we’re reliving the trauma again, both emotionally and physically.
Once we clear the energy, however, it becomes “neutral”, as ordinary as any normal episode or person. We can think about it without feeling impacted and bothered.
It’s not easy to explain how it feels to clear an energetic trauma or scar, but the closest I’ve heard is to feel free, clean and clear. It really shifts emotions, outlook and reactions!
I have seen people completely change from energy clearings, myself included – energy is everything, we live in a universe of vibrating particles and frequency waves. Nothing is solid.
Shared energy fields of Twin Flames
Because the Twin Flames are of identical energetic signatures, we share the same energy field – this means that one Twin Flame can go in and energetically clear negativity for the other.
An “awakened” Twin can make a big positive difference to the dynamic between the two by clearing negativity with energy tools. I recently created the Complete Harmony Healing for Twin Flames to help remove triggers of running and separation. You can read more about that here.
In addition, I’ve seen in my intuitive practice and my own Twin Flame journey that the basis of Running often is rooted in painful past life experiences – karma. Examples are episodes when one Twin has died and the other was “abandoned”, or if one Twin has betrayed the other in the past: these patterns and low energies tend to come into play whenever the Twin Flames interact.
When this is the case, the “awakened” Twin can clear karma for both Twins (karma is unhealed energy, so once it’s healed the past episode can be let go of for good and will no longer be in our energy fields “waiting to be triggered”).
Ultimately, when a Runner Twin’s energy is changed and cleared they will no longer feel the need to Run.
Tools to End Separation
In the Twin Flames Vibrational Alignment Program we show you how to clear negative energy with ease, plus simple karma clearing tools that will resolve lingering issues in one single application. The tools also enable you to cut any cords and energetic attachments to past lovers and marriage contracts that may be holding you back on your Twin Flame journey.
Alternatively you can try our Free Starter Kit, which contains selections of the full program.
Since using energy clearing tools my life and emotions have completely changed for the better and my Twin and I are now in Union. We created the Twin Flames Vibrational Alignment Program to help other Twins resolve separation and challenges for good to come together in love.
Sending you love and light for your journey <3
– Cassady x
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